He's not all bad. no wonder we have the type of problems we have in our communitieswe are always reacting instead of thinking.. you cant correct a mistake or problem with another people.. Second, if she were to make that decision previously to have an abortion for whatever reason you are not someone whose opinion matters since you're on an Internet forum and you don't know the personal lives of anyone on here enough to dictate that they should never have an abortion. A Group Leader is a What to Expect community member who has been selected by our staff to help maintain a positive, supportive tone within a group. Damaged. I want to be a father!!! Good luck to you. Babies can put stress on a couple because it requires both mom and dad to give of themselves. Made a mistake without any intention to make it surely will freak someone out. start communicatin with her without quarrellin give her a try n am sure things gonna work out Or r u afraid u wont be able to sleep around or play ur games wen she step into urlife dear dwag such life n face reality. U r runnin away from marriage cos u didn love her b4 ?? I was not in love with the guy I got pregnant by. Just not with her. I'm having a baby with someone I'm not in love with. My Husband Left Me At 60 To Have A Baby With A Younger Woman. Here's NOW YOU WONT BE ALWAYS PHYSICALLY THERE, BUT BECUASE YOU ARE A HAPPY PERSON THAT WILL TRANSLATE THAT. AND NOW EVERY ONE IS UPHAPPY, MISARABLE, INCLUDING THE CHILD. The way you wrote that sounds like you think what a man wants is not as important as what a woman wants. Told me "**** the baby" I was gone for a while after that but went back due to having no where else to go. I know most of yall are gonna tell me to leave him and I wish it was that easy. Only knowing that you don't feel good with your current situation won't make any change unless you do. He shdnt forget the welfare of the child involved. To start? a deed frowned upon by society and seen as a problem The deed has already been done instead of advising and coming up with ways to make sure the child is brought up in a obviously deserving loving environment that the child needs instead of an environment filled with resentment, hate, misery, spitefulness etc etc, you all are pushing.insulting and forcing the guy to guy marry the girl in question.. marrying that girl would even be a bigger mistake and problem than the first one. If you don't, pursuing. And Maggie Makes Three - Wikipedia Having a baby with someone you don't love advice needed I've been with my boyfriend for years and I still don't know if I love him. Sheffield Utd X Tottenham - Ao Vivo Grtis HD Sem - futebolgratis.net Long story short. Unless your girlfriend deems fine that you both do not continue the relationship, by all means.". Girl sits on her partner, he turning her on the back. i know for sure u dated her for longer b4 she got pregnant start looking at the quality this gal have n think of ur daughter after that give her a chance n delete that mind of not loving her out of ur mind n married her ..am sure God will give u new hrt to love her.. The longer you stay with him the more he's going to think you do have feelings for him and it will only hurt him more in the end. Things You'll Wish You'd Known Before Having A Baby - TheList.com My only advice is to make sure you don't make your or your wife or your baby's life miserable. Only good thing that came out of it are my children. Leaving a pregnant girlfriend with your child, in my view is very selfish and irresponsible. MzGee Ditches 3Music TV To Take Over Nana Ama McBrowns Show At UTV. Create an account or log in to participate. 1.) Otherwise, you will lose the child and her altogether. Life is too short to spend even one month chained to someone you're not in love with. Is it okay for you to feel down all the time thinking about the mistake you did? 2Face. To help you make the fewest blunders possible, let me give you a few tips: 1. As to my ex yes she is into me, we where together for over 9 years, this current relationship is just 10 months old! To begin, the average cost of vaginal delivery in the US, with health insurance, is $4,300. You could have an easy pregnancy, a quick easy delivery and a healthy happy baby. Though they don't have a child, Oprah and Stedman have been together for decades and have no intention of being married. What kind of advice do you really want, the best advice would be to take care of your baby, dont let yours and your other half (lool) silly selves to pollute her upbringing. He wasn't meant for marriage, he was a party guy, a free bird, and only got married because he was afraid I'd sue him for child support later. I guess I'm just looking for someone on the same boat because I really wish I could have someone to talk to. my point is no one really wins in this situation. I was literally about to break up with her (we were in the process of breaking up), when she announced she was pregnant. We've been together 9. We didn't have to be. I need help moving on. It wasn't ideal but eventually I got a better job and bought myself a nice car. He and my parents think that we are in love, but I have been keeping my true feelings to myself for 6 months: I don't love him. Yes, you can still be happy in a relationship without being married. Wear a condom, or allow some woman to own your future (and your money) for a couple decades of your life! At the end of the day, you won't be able to find happiness that you have been looking for. We don't have to be together to love our children. Lana Del Rey - Black Beauty Lyrics | AZLyrics.com This is the most stupid guy I have seen in my life twety something years of existance. Wasn't looking for a sugar daddy. Support yourself. I too got burned with the kid trap. In the time that I got pregnant I feel that I was in a daze thinking I was in love but recently I feel like I snapped out of it. not truly in love with the gf), then you can break up. THE CHILD UNSTABLE, EVEN MORE **** UP. Long story as short as possible! THIS IS THE ENVIROMENT IN THIS SITUATION. It just reads so snobby and lazy. I don't get how you came to that conclusion and you are just a bitter girl that The best alterantive is if you can be amicable and stay friends w/your child's mother and cooperate for the kid's sake, although w/the emotions involved that isn't always possible. So, maybe try to establish a relationship with your baby now, stick it out for a year or so (w/o getting married), then once you've bonded w/the kid and proven you are a devoted dad, split up w/GF and file for custody. If I could do something different, it would be to divorce as soon as my last daughter was born. 3 Reasons Men Stop Having Sex With Women They Say They Love - YourTango But that luxury comes with an expiration date, especially for women. AS to your ex, is she still into you, or is it one-sided? go and apologise. She got pregnant 3 months after meeting him. We strive to provide you with a high quality community experience. My Boyfriend Wants To Have A Baby With Another Woman Does it feels good to fake your feelings? Is anyone in the same situation. Even if it does get better, odds are it won't, why would you want to have a life with someone you don't love? So, chances are, she's not speaking as she normally would. I want to love this baby, but I can't shake how I feel. Pros And Cons Of Being A "Baby Face" Woman | Regain Please specify a reason for deleting this reply from the community. Also, if it's bad now it will only get worse once the baby is here. We only dated for three months before I got pregnant. SEE THEM EVERYDAY. The ex and i still argue sometimes but you have to learn when to shut up. Thank you for purchase! Then suddenly she is all happy, and loved up which I find really hard to believe. It depends on the person. Begin speaking about the kids, as well, mentioning different accomplishments they've made lately . JP friend, thanks for taking the time to read my post and offer your advise. I My ex-girlfriend is pregnant. @jessi, LMFAOI like ur commentVery BLUNT and to the POINT. She bullied me into a wedding & now I am miserable. gals are expect dnt 4get. Be strong. 'Why I never want babies' - BBC News 10 Behaviors Women Show When They're With Their True Love People don't know he has a daughter, which tells me he's not proud of her, or truly claiming her in any way. Group Leaders communicate with staff moderators and escalate potential violations for review, but they dont moderate discussions. 8 Insults No Woman Ever Deserves (Stop Them Immediately) - Bolde Honestly if I wouldn't of gotten pregnant I would not be with him. If someone truly needs GA, that's absolutely what it's for. You're an adult. It may be tolerable now, but it sounds like you are unhappy. He is a grown up. She will touch you in a gentle way, kiss you softly and hug you with her heart. But we started fighting more and more. I tried to keep them happy and not see the fighting. The altnerative is to stay with a woman you don't love and that is a lose-lose all around, even for the kid who will be able to sense his parents don't love each other. Also, you must then decide if you want to be in the child's life, how you will coordinate co-parenting a kid when you're not in a relationship, etc. I'm having a baby with someone I'm not in love with. Everybody deserves someone who is able to appreciate, respect, and love themselves. There are reasons on why you should never date a pothead. Having children is not cheap. You need to discuss with him so that you won't need to face the how do I deal with a break up while I am still pregnant his baby alone. Not that it matters - if you have feelings for someone else, you can't be in love with your gf so sounds like leaving is the right decision, as staying together for a child with someone you don't love never works out in the long run. Falling in love again at 47 and marrying for the second time at 52 was a miracle. First step: Don't rush things. You could have the best partner and tons of family support. . 2. What issues have you two had? What now? You CAN NOT let someone have the upper hand on you. How Having a Baby Affects Your Relationship With Your Partner By Simon Maybin. SCENARIO 4: BE TRUTHFUL TO THE PREGNANT GIRLFRIEND AND LET HER ALSO HAVE SAY AS TO WHAT SHE WANTS. Married for few months. Love and Pregnancy: Can a Baby Save Your Struggling Relationship? - Parents It's his car, it's not petty if he keeps it. Grown apart and have no interest in each others lives! YOU CANNOT PROVIDE HAPPINESS WHEN YOU ARE NOT HAPPY. Take this advice as if your life depends on it. I dont think Ill be at peace with her in marriage. My name is Michelle Devani, and I've been helping people with their relationships since 2003. And one of the problems is the appearance of a question having a baby with someone you don't want to be with, how to deal with it? When I did he the. Having a complex relationship that involves a baby mama means you have to include the other woman in your life; whether you like it or not. The author playing in the snow in December 2022. ALL THIS TRANSLATE TO THE CHILD. If you have the "baby blues" you might not notice the sadness or moodiness right away. Your post will be hidden and deleted by moderators. Good luck. know it's right to give her the fact straight but she is just a really nice person, and I feel really **** you know! Sorry for the long story, but I wanted to give you an example of how the other side of things could go. If you don't want to be controlled, don't make yourself 100% dependent on someone. Can't and haven't said a word to anyone about how i feel. "People would say, 'I don't want to have a baby because I don't have money or I don't have time or I don't have a partner,'" he says. Suck it up because you didn't do her any favours having to live with you either. Learn more about, Realizing I Had PPD After Returning to Work as a Soldier in the U.S. Army, Planned c section too presumptuous??? Subscribe to Medium for only $5/month & read ALL my sizzling hot stories! This is reason why i always advice Ladies that they need to STOP creating soul ties by sexing guys Sex isnt better than love its about time you Let the men know in upfront that you are not having sex before marriage. My youngest doesn't really remember anything. Ease into the conversation. Mothers who regret having children are speaking up like - Macleans.ca If something that can work out for you to try loving her, that would be most ideal. But, then again, falling in love is always phenomenal and terrifying. You said you quit your job Is that because of the pregnancy? When we found out this baby is a boy, the feeling of disconnection multiplied; I know this baby is going to be like his daddy. I have heard that arranged marriages actually have a better long term outcome because of this. what is de main reason why u do not love her?? It will not update but downgrade yourself. We strive to provide you with a high quality community experience. You don't even love him. "All of the rational thoughts. AND THE END OF THE DAY IS ALSO HERS. That's when one of them dropped the term . I do feel sorry for you and the situation you are in. You are right it is not fair to her. She's told me I'll get to see the kid and stuff but she doesn't want me in her life anymore because I make her too unhappy. Create an account or log in to participate. Everything that we do, we have to bear all consequences. 1. And you will also need to take a firm decision on what you think is best to be done. I was By entering this site you declare Use of this site is subject to our terms of use and privacy policy. She Wants to Keep the Baby But I Don't Sounds like she was looking for a sugar daddy and ended up getting pregnant. I honestly could not ever think of missing out on this child's growing up, especially the early stages. Tist: Group Owners uphold the core values of the brand by reporting content that violates the community guidelines. On the most basic level, these changes, prompted by a flood of hormones during pregnancy and in the postpartum period, help attract a new mother to her baby. There are many women out here who will do this if given the chance. NOW WHY IS IT THAT SO MANY OF US HAD MESSED UP CHILDHOOD? They were always fighting, unhappy. Good luck. 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You would [hopefully] love your child, while also realizing that you shouldn't be having sex with anyone that you don't want to have a baby with. well you could say society won because it was able to force a marriage albeit a miserable one. As such, you'll need to spend time with both his child's mom and his child. If you feel a message or content violates these standards and would like to request its removal please submit the following information and our moderating team will respond shortly. When Bonding Isn't Immediate: Feeling Like You Don't Love Your Baby . A. Get Your Sex Life Back After Baby - WebMD Being in a loveless relationship is not a good example for the LO you already have and the one on the way. My kids are doing good. Privacy Policy. We had been dating for maybe a few months before exclusive. ( though I don't see the first one as a mistake because making babies should not be a mistake.it is the natural order of things).you cant force people to do things out of their wishes and desires. Sex can lead to pregnancy and I'm assuming you knew the possibility of pregnancy when you made the choice. This relationship is bad for my wife and me. Adoption is for some people who want to unselfishly make sure the child is cared for and loved by people who can support it just like toughing it out and having the child, supporting it, and loving it is for others. Right now her parents are planning to bring her over to my house. CLARITY friend you do make a lot of sense. Long Story Short, I Don't Love My Pregnant Girlfriend. I Was THE TRUTH IS THAT NO MATTER LOVE CANNOT BE FORCED. think twice before sharing personal details, foster a friendly and supportive environment, remove fake accounts, spam and misinformation, delete posts that violate our community guidelines, reviewed by our medical review board and team of experts. I was in the same boat. SCENARIO 1: STAY WITH HER BECUASE SHE IS PREGNANT (THIS IS THE FOUNDATION OF THE RELATIONSHIP). New Study: Millennial Women Are Delaying Having Children Due - Forbes Call your old boss, call family and friends, research aid and stop telling yourself you're stuck. 1997-2023 BabyCenter, LLC, a Ziff Davis company. I would sacrifice my own happiness and stay for the kids not interested in been with anyone else just want my girls and soon to arrive boy to be happy? We respect everyones right to express their thoughts and opinions as long as they remain respectful of other community members, and meet What to Expects Terms of Use. Forgotting that there's gonna be 3 children in his life forever? Please select a reason for escalating this post to the WTE moderators: Connect with our community members by starting a discussion. Please whitelist our site to get all the best deals and offers from our partners. Keep reading for our tips and advice, and then give Pregnancy & Fatherhood Solutions a call today at (915) 249-1344 or visit us online to . Having a baby with someone you don't love - What to Expect As I said earlier, each person has different needs. I am at a loss as to what I must do. Chandra is a mom of three boys (8, 4, and 3) and the founder of Oh Lovely Day, a lifestyle blog with a honest look at motherhood.She is trying to create more of an open dialogue with a no . "Once you cross that line, look for life to get easier in every way. You will need to end an unwanted relationship. You've been clear with him from the start. We found out. We are two total opposite people. You should have your own baby feelings figured out. He pays for the stuff bc he can afford too and didn't want me working while pregnant which was fine when everything was good. When One Partner Doesn't Want a Baby - Parents So today at my apt (weekly NST/ ultrasound due to Covid protocol) baby girl measured 8lb 2 ounces and short so they are saying she will be a big baby and have a big headI had my cervix checked and Im not dilated any nor has 35 weeks - desperate to getto finish line ?? She may have decided against an abortion thinking you will still be with her, but if not, TELL HER it is over and you will not be involved with her anymore (except of course whatever involvement you ahve with the child, support and custody-wise). NOW THE CHILD IS BORN. I've been trying to put my pride/ego/whatever aside and be with her, but it really kills me. He has been nothing but supportive, but I do not love him. When a Woman Loves You She Will Do These 10 Things - Doctor For Love 8 Facts About Having a Baby With a Surrogate - Health Would I do it again? I think it's best to do what will make you the happiest. Find advice, support and good company (and some stuff just for fun). (5 kg) or more a year after giving birth, Live Science previously reported. "And Maggie Makes Three" is the thirteenth episode of the sixth season of the American animated television series The Simpsons. I got my, now wife, pregnant but she never loved me, in fact a month before she got pregnant she actually went to spend the night with some dude at a hotel in a different city, but she told me she just wanted to go away for a couple of days. Do you think that she would let you be a father if you two were to split? The way you speak to yourself has a lot to do with the way you view your situation. the repercussions and consequences of such an act always plays out. Just here to say I constantly feel guilty for all of the crying I have done this pregnancy. I want to leave my 4 months pregnant girlfriend !! On top of that, my age (early forties) scared me into accepting the situation thinking that i am too old to start all over again and wasting more time. Just that simple. Does he still love me? Add to Collection. Probably. I completely respect her decision on this. It was enough for me to be content, while I gave the kids a life that I never had. This is why i found it hard to break up with her although I'd thought about it many times in the past. You can be in a long-term relationship with someone and never get married. marrying that girl would even be a bigger mistake and problem than the first one. I got pregnant and was pressured to get married. Welcoming your new baby with wishes of health, joy and plenty of sleep. . And remember, folks who don't want kids don't want kids. My father married my mother when she became pregnant times were different then of course. !I've been married for ten long miserable years to a wife I never loved. You have to do what you feel is right. Please, please do not have an abortion like somebody commented. but she didn't have her baby . I got pregnant in September of 2011. Archived discussions are usually a bit older and not as active as other community content. Now it is tearing me apart. DO YOU WANT TO CHILD TO HAVE A MESSED UP UPBRINGING LIKE YOU DID? Start off by talking about your family, how you're feeling about work and home in general, and your love for your wife. 2005-2023Everyday Health, Inc., a Ziff Davis company. This is why friends with benefits is never a good idea. I'm supposed to get married in a month. Do not be with someone you don't want to be with. Eight women in their 20s, 30s, and 40s spoke to Insider about their decision to be child-free. Aside from personal decision to have an unwanted relationship and questioning such question of having a baby with someone you don't want to be with, how to deal with it, we will need to be responsible. AND NO ONE IN THIS SITUATION WILL BE HAPPY IF IT IS. To allow yourself to stay in a toxic relationship will be useless. And, the combination of all of these factors can really take a toll on your relationship if you're not careful. I tried to make myself love him. Back then I loved her and I felt sorry for her because she took the decision of getting marry to me even though she didn't love me. If thats all he wants, he will be gone. My ex won't come back to me after I hurt h Ex girlfriend is pregnant with her new boyfriend months after breaking up with me. That doesn't mean you give up your relationship w/the child, you will have to share custody, and likely pay support (unless you have the kid more than she does, but that's rare).
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